Unlucky Cycle #3

Well cycle # 3 was not lucky for me at all. I took soy isoflavones this cycle. I was hoping it would help me O earlier but it did not. I still didn't O until CD 28 and ended up with a 40 day cycle. I felt like my CM wasn't great either. The B6 seemed to still help with my LP. It is not great but I did get to 12dpo again. Hopefully if I keep taking it I will eventually make it to 14dpo or more importantly a BFP. I felt like I really struggled to O this cycle. I had a feeling that despite our olympic BDing around O it would not be enough. My body tried to hard for to long and I am sure the quality of egg that popped out wasn't great.

I do not think I will use soy again this cycle. I don't feel like it did me any good so why put myself through it again. I want to continue until the end of the year with charting, OPKs and my fertility monitor. DH wants me to call the RE ... TODAY and get the ball rolling. I am not sure I am ready to go there yet. I want to give it until the end of the year to try on our own. They said we only had to wait 3 failed cycles but I feel a little better going in and saying we have been TTC for 6 months and it is not working for us again. I don't know. Maybe DH is right and I should at least make the phone call. Maybe they will tell me Wyatt is to young and I need to give my body more time to heal. Maybe they will tell me my weight is to much and I need to lose some weight first. BTW my RE from last time never said a good gosh darn word about my weight or DH's. But it is still a fear because one of her coworkers did say something to me after I got pregnant with Wyatt. I guess I don't really know what I am afraid of. Just hearing some one say no we will not help you have another child yet. I would like a chance to try Weight Watchers again and maybe lose some weight. That would be another thing I could go in saying "I know I am fat but I have been working on losing weight and I have lost X pounds while we were TTC". I don't know. I will have to sit down and talk to DH about it more tonight after work. Fingers crossed that this will happen for us and we won't have to see a RE again. I have one poof baby. Why can't I have two? LOL

Fun with the ring test.

I was watching some of the vlogs I subscribe to today and one girl did this fun ring test to do the gender of her baby.



http://youtu.be/-k14-eeUyuk



She took her wedding ring and a piece of her own hair to hand her ring from. She asked yes or no questions first to get what means yes and what means no. If you watch the video you will see what I am talking about. I decided to give it a try for just regular yes or no questions to see what happened. I did it a couple of times and got the same result every time.

I used 3 objects and asked first if this object is (insert correct answer here) and my ring would swing back and forth. Then I would ask if the object was (insert incorrect answer here) and my ring would swing in circles. So back and forth meant yes and circles meant no. Once I had that down I started asking questions.



I held my ring over my belly and asked if I was currently pregnant. My ring swung back and forth. That is a yes! I then asked if I tested this weekend would I get a BFP. Again my ring swung back and forth. Another yes! I then asked if I was pregnant would this baby be a girl. Yet again it swung back and forth. Yeah baby girl! Lastly I asked if I am currently pregnant would this baby be a boy. I got HUGE circles! So that would be a no to a boy.

I made a couple of videos to show how it worked for me.

Video 1
http://youtu.be/aZEw_8huIiM

Video 2
http://youtu.be/fLTN7sr6mnQ

Lucky cycle #3 for baby #3?

I am officially on to cycle number 3 of TTC baby number 3. Booooooo! This stinks! But I knew I didn't have much hope for this last cycle. I ovulated way late and then we only had sex on the day of ovulation. So it was pretty far fetched to think I would be pregnant now.

I woke up at 3:45 am this morning with some majorly nasty cramps. I got up and took some ibupofen and attempted to go back to bed. I was in to much pain to sleep and laying down made the cramps worse. So I went out to the living room to sit in the recliner while I waited for the ibuprofen to work. I drifted off for a little while and woke back up again at 5:30 am. I felt worse then I did before I took the ibuprofen. So I took some tylenol and that has helped a little bit. I still feel lousy but better then I did. I still think cramps are salt in the wounds. It is bad enough that you are not pregnant but now you have to feel like poop to drive home the point. UGH!

At least I have a plan for this new cycle. I can start fresh and hope that this will be our cycle. I bought some soy isoflavones to try out. I will take it just like I took clomid while TTC with Wyatt. I will continue with my prenatal vitamin, B6 and iron supplements too. The B6 helped lengthen my LP this cycle by a couple of days. The iron has been helping my energy levels. I have been getting a lot more done at work and at home. So I am going to continue those things and try the soy isoflavones also. Hopefully it will be the right mix and I will be expecting another June baby!

Catching up

I obviously need to take some time to catch up. I get so caught up in the day to day business that I forget to keep track of everything Wyatt is doing.

Wyatt is 13 months old now. He is walking a lot. Wyatt took his first steps on Memorial day. By the 4th of July he was walking a lot on his own. Now he walks more then he crawls. It used to be the other way around. He is so proud of himself and is so darn cute. It is hard to yell at him when he is toddling away from you no matter how horrible the thing he is doing is.

He knows how to crawl up on to the furniture and get back down on his own. He often will climb onto the arms of the couch and has fallen off twice now. You would think he would learn but that kid is fearless. If you leave the recliner unattended for more then a few seconds he will crawl up into the chair and make himself at home. Wyatt will either be slamming his little hands on the keyboard of the laptop or throwing everything off the side tables. He does not care if you just opened that can of pop.

Wyatt is not talking much. He picks up a new word every now and then and will use it over and over and over again until your head is about to explode. Then he just stops using it and moves on to something else. For the longest time it was the word tree. Everything was a TREEEEEEEEE!!! While he may not talk a lot himself he does understand and respond to you. It is way to funny when you tell him to paddy cake and he starts clapping his hands. Throw it in the oven is by far his favorite part.

So now that our little one is well on his way to being a toddler I am getting the ache for a baby again. I know crazy. I miss snuggley cuddly baby time. Even if Wyatt was never much of a cuddler. He is just to darn busy to snuggle. At least a year ago he would hold still once in a while. So it is starting to feel like it is time to TTC again. We will see what each day brings. I am praying that we have an easy transition and get pregnant quickly. I do not wish to return to our RE if we don't have to no matter how wonderful she was. But at least we know where to start this time around if we end up needing the help. Fingers crossed that we won't need any help.

Bring on the teeth!

Wyatt is teething again. He cut his second tooth yesterday morning. He now has the two bottom teeth in the front. He is working on the two front top teeth also. It has been kicking his butt! Wyatt has had a low grade fever and crabby and chewing on everything. It has been miserable. Wyatt has barely slept at all two nights in a row now. You can see his top gums are swollen and red. The two teeth are bulging at the gums. HURRY UP AND BREAK THROUGH! So my boy can get back to being a happy little man ... and sleep again!

3 year angel anniversary

Today is our 3 year angel anniversary. I can not believe it has already been 3 years since I miscarried. It is one of those things that seems like it happened just yesterday and an entire life time ago all at the same time. We had tried so hard for 2 years to get pregnant. We were so happy and excited to finally be having our first child together. We had shared the wonderful news with all of our family and friends.

But shortly after sharing the news cramping and spotting began. The doctor told me to lay down, rest and drink lots of water. Hoping that was all I needed to do to stop what I knew was happening I spent a few days in bed trying to rest. But it did no good. Our baby had no heart beat on the ultrasound. 3 years ago today the contractions started and we lost our child ... our dream ... a member of our family who we already loved more then life itself.

I wish I knew then what I know now. It would not have cut the pain. I lost a child. My baby died and there was nothing I could do to stop it. Nothing makes that better. But at least if I had known 3 years later I would have an amazing baby boy to hold and love I would have had hope. Back then I had very little hope.

Every holiday is at least a little difficult because I know we are missing a family member. I look at Bob and my heart aches for the baby who should be his age. The child who should be a big brother or sister right now. But then I look at my boys and I am grateful. I am grateful that I had the strength to make the choice to keep and raise Bryan. Despite all that has happened I have never for a single second regretted my decision to parent. I am grateful for the gift of experiencing pregnancy, birth and raising a child with my wonderful loving husband. Something I was worried I would never get to experience. I am grateful for this beautiful, high energy and extremely happy baby boy. Wyatt is every thing I dreamed off. He is everything I thought I lost that day. He is my light. He is my hope. He is my joy. I am grateful for my husband and my sons and my sweet angel baby in heaven looking down on us. We love you and we miss you every single day. You are never forgotten angel. Until we meet again we love you.

On the move!

This boy is all over the place now! I was pumping yesterday. I watched Wyatt army crawl (because he hasn't yet figured out that he can go forward on his hands and knees) around the side of the couch and out of my line of sight. So of course I had to turn the pump off and figure out what he was up to. Because every cord in the house looks like it needs to me wrestled and eaten ... NOW! Because the chihuahua is Wyatt sized and her ears are fun to pull and her eyes even more fun to poke. Because the carpet is coming up in front of the recliner and apparently Wyatt has taken up the art of carpet removal. Can some one teach him to mop or vacuum instead? Because people throw things towards the bathroom garbage can but make no effort to pick it up when they miss by a mile. So I turn off the pump and walk around the couch. Wyatt was in front of the bookcase playing with the movies on the bottom shelf. He had pulled one out. I informed him that he was far to young to watch Resident Evil and told him to get out of there. But instead of backing up are turning around he gets on his hands and knees and rocks back and forth. Then screams in anger when he cracks his head on the book shelf over and over again. *sigh* It is a good thing he is cute.

Separation Anxiety

Separation anxiety has set in ... lucky me. Don't get me wrong I love snuggling the baby. But he wanted to be in my arms for large amounts of time yesterday. And if I wasn't snuggling him while sitting in the middle of a pile of laundry that I only got half folded and that he was wiping his nose on then I was chasing him around. He does not crawl yet but he does creep. He pulls himself around on his belly with his arms like some kind of tiny little zombie child. (He bites with that one little tooth so be careful) It gets him around and it gets him there pretty fast. And the Christmas tree is still up. I have been sick. He decided that his big brother's Christmas ornaments and the string of lights looked like fabulous things to chew on. With out the presents there to block him it was a free for all. My tree skirt is no longer under the tree. He pulled it out, rolled around in it and left it for dead in the middle of the living room. *sigh* Why are boys so messy?